the latest

We went to see my doctor today. The good news is that my doctor thinks I'm only dilated to a 1 or 1 1/2 right now. My cervix is definitely still effaced about 50% and Asher still has his head down in my pelvis. Dr. Schlegel could feel his head when she checked me.

I am still having contractions sporadically, and they come more when I move around, so I'm basically on a modified bed rest to keep them to a minimum. I'm probably going to go into work one more time next week to wrap things up there. And our trip to New York is off. But I feel grateful that I'm not in the hospital and not on complete bed rest.

This is just a stressful time for all of this to happen since we are moving on Saturday. I'm so grateful for everyone from church who is helping out. We really couldn't do this without them.

my new toy

Remember how Jared got that grant from BYU? Well last night he ventured out to the Apple Store and came home with one of these beauties:I am sitting pretty here on my bed playing on the new laptop while Jared works on the desktop. Life is good.

He also brought home one of these from Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory:

Delicious!!! I may have to be on bed rest right now, but my wonderful husband is taking good care of me. After all, he brought me home an Apple and an apple. What more could a girl want?

In other good news, I've only had one contraction so far today! And little Asher is being quite the wiggle worm this morning. It's fun to feel him.

bed rest for now

Quick update... I spoke with my doctor this afternoon and she wants me on bed rest at least until I see her on Thursday. These next few weeks are crucial for our little guy and we want him to stay in there! I went into work for a couple hours today just to wrap up some loose ends but I probably won't be going in the rest of the week and might be done completely since next week was supposed to be my last week anyway. We'll see. I've been having more contractions so I'm trying to really limit my movement. Jared is actually going to get a new laptop tonight, so that will be nice for me to have during this. Thanks for all the well wishes and prayers! It means so much to us.

home from the hospital

The story:

Saturday night I started bleeding. It wasn't tons of blood, but it wasn't stopping either, so we called the hospital and they told us to come in and get checked out. The doctor said it probably wasn't a huge deal but I should be checked out to make sure. We got there about 10 pm, went up to Labor and Delivery and they set me up in a triage room. The first year resident came in and did an exam. She said there was quite a bit of blood in there and had the attending come in to look. He checked me out and then checked my cervix and discovered I am 2 cm dilated, 50% effaced, and -2 station. Not a good thing when I'm only 30 weeks. The nurse hooked me up to the monitors and I was having contractions about every 3 minutes. The crazy thing is that I wasn't feeling them at first. I had to pay close attention and then ask the nurse to confirm I was having one. I wasn't in any pain. There would just be some tightening and my abdomen would get hard.

Another resident then came in and did an ultrasound. They wanted to check the baby's size, etc in case labor progressed. Asher is head down and partway in my pelvis but he looks great. They guesstimated his size is even a week or two ahead of schedule--about 3 1/2 pounds. Good news. And his heart rate is perfect.

So the doctors said I'd have to stay the night and be watched. They gave me a shot of steroids to help Asher's lungs mature should he decide to make an early appearance. They also hooked me up to an IV to get some fluids in me to help slow things down. Over the course of the next few hours, I continued to have contractions but they eventually slowed down. (Although they did get strong enough that they were very obvious to me.) They checked my cervix again and I hadn't dilated anymore so they decided I wouldn't need to be on any other medication to stop labor, took me off all the monitors and let me sleep. It was about 2 am at this point.

The next morning they moved me up a floor to the Maternity ward. I felt good all day, except for the boredom. I wasn't even allowed to leave the room. I could only get up to go to the bathroom. I was still bleeding a bit but it slowed down a lot. And I wasn't having contractions. But it was a long day stuck in a hospital bed. Poor Jared was getting pretty antsy.

About five my relief society president and visiting teacher came to visit. It as a very nice distraction. Thanks for the yummy cookies, Dianna! I also talked to a couple friends on the phone which helped too.

I went to sleep about 10:30 and then they woke me up around 12:15 to give me another shot of steroids. I slept until about 6:30 this morning. A resident came in about 7:30ish and told us as long as everything looks good we'd be going home soon. She came back a little later and checked my cervix again--still a two. I wasn't bleeding any new blood and hadn't been contracting, so she said I could get dressed and she and the attending would be in soon to talk to us before I left. The nurse hooked up the monitors one more time to check on Asher and make sure I wasn't contracting. Things still looked great. The doctors came back after 9 and we talked about what I can and can't do.

Basically, I'm allowed to return to normal activity but I need to be hyper-vigilant about everything. Any little thing out of the ordinary is a reason to call my doctor/hospital. I also realized after talking to them that I've been having more contractions than I realized. Times where I thought Asher was just pushing on me were actually contractions. And Braxton Hicks are no longer part of our vocabulary because I'm dilated. If I have more than 4 contractions in an hour, I have to call the doctor.

So tomorrow I'll be calling my doctor and hopefully getting in to see her very soon. I'm allowed to go back to work as long as I take it easy. The big thing this week is that we are moving (just across town) and there is still much packing to do. Some of the lovely ladies from church are going to come over a couple nights this week and help out. I'm so grateful for that support system. I can't imagine how we'd manage without that.

I have been having a few mild contractions this afternoon and am trying to pay really close attention to them and keep track. I just never realized that contractions could be so hard to discern. I have had no pain or discomfort. But Asher is doing great. We just want to get through at least another 4 weeks so he can get a bit bigger. And chances are he'll stay in there longer than that. But keep us in your prayers! I'll keep you updated.

about 70 days to go... we hope.

This is Jared, and I just wanted to write a little update post. Katrina and I had an unexpected wake up call last night, though right now everything looks like it is going to be fine. Katrina was bleeding a bit yesterday, and so we decided to go in to the hospital and have it looked at. We were quite surprised when we found out that Katrina is already 2 cm dilated! In fact, for a bit there it looked like Asher might make an appearance then and there... Katrina was having contractions that were mild but only 3 minutes apart, and was 50% effaced. Those have now stopped, but the doctors are keeping her in the hospital through tomorrow. They have given her steroids to help Asher just in case, but the people we talked to seemed confident that things are going to be fine, and that we hopefully still have close to two months left before Asher arrives.

It doesn't take much out of the ordinary to make one evaluate our lives and appreciate what we have. It was so hard for me to see Katrina uncomfortable, though she did a great job. So we are going to be really careful for the rest of the pregnancy. For my part, I am going to hurry up and get the work done that I need to for summer projects! We appreciate your thoughts and prayers, and I am sure Katrina will post about this when she comes home.

and they're nice guys too

One more thing about Idol and then I'm done. I just wanted to say how great it is that both the Davids seem to be such nice, humble guys. Case in point:

David Cook: You know, the respect that I have for David Archuleta is very much past a competitor thing. He has more talent at his age than I know what to do with at 25. So, to be able to share the stage with him was an honor for me. Read more here

David Archuleta: Cook, he’s like my big brother. I’ve learned so much. I’ve looked up to him since the beginning of this. He’s just such a great guy — really humble, down to earth and I just feel like I can’t believe I’m standing next to him. Read more here

Isn't it nice to know that they genuinely like and respect each other?

david cook takes it home

photo from the huffington post

Let's talk Idol.

Was anyone else surprised Cook took home the prize last night?

First let me say that I LOVE David Cook! He's been my favorite from early on. Although Archuleta is a talented boy, he just didn't do it for me. I found him a bit on the boring side. Sweet, humble, and very talented, but boring nonetheless. However, after Tuesday's show, I really thought Archuleta was gonna win. He had a better night. David Cook was awesome, but he didn't bring the house down the way little David did. And with all those teeny-boppers and Mormons out there, I had pretty much given up hope that Cook would win. Not that I didn't vote for him... more than once.

So last night... I was really impressed when Simon actually apologized to Cook for his comments the night before. I'm glad that Simon realized upon watching the show again that it maybe wasn't the "knock out" he said it was. And then Ryan read the results. When he said the winner won by 12 million votes, I still thought it was going to be Archuleta. But then he said David.... Cook!

Yeah, I'm happy. He totally deserves it and he's going to make a killer album! And Archuleta is going to be juuust fine. We all know that you don't have to win to go on to be successful.

What's crazy is that more than 97 million votes were cast overall, 23 million more than American Idol's previous high.

Did you vote? Who did you vote for? What did you think of the results?

full-time

I'm going to become a full-time mama a little sooner than I was planning on. My plan had been to work just afternoons once the kids are here because Jared teaches in the mornings. Unfortunately, I found out today that the powers that be at work have decided they won't let me go part-time in June and want to hire someone full-time to replace me. So my last day of work will be June 6. (btw, I haven't worked here long enough to get maternity leave.)

I have to say I'm pretty surprised. I honestly thought they'd be more open to the idea, especially since it would only be for a few weeks, and then I'd be leaving to have the baby anyway. So I'm feeling lots of mixed emotions right now. On the one hand, it will be really nice to not work. I will definitely have plenty to keep me busy with the three kids here and a baby to prepare for. And I am definitely sick of this job. On the other hand, I had mentally prepared myself to work through most of July, so it's very strange all of a sudden to only have 10-11 days of work left. Plus, obviously, it would have been very nice to have that income.

But such is life.

We did get some good news this week however. Jared received a VERY nice bit of money from a BYU grant. He's using it to buy a new laptop, which he'll need to teach his class this summer. And there will still be a very nice chunk left over. What's awesome is that Jared found out about the grant after the deadline had passed, but he followed through and they let him turn it in anyway and he got it! He has always had the gift to make things happen, and once again it really paid off. Thanks, BYU!

i too must give

She came in late. She chose our row and scooted uncomfortably close to my husband as she made room for two, three, four little boys. We kept moving over until I was sitting quite close to dear Sister Rust on my left. She made no apology, no excuses, no thank yous as she obliviously made room on the end of the row for her brood.

The boys were shaggy haired and sloppily dressed. They were in sore need of baths. They were squabbling and restless.

I was annoyed. I was judgmental. I was bothered that this woman didn't at least acknowledge our presence as she practically sat in my husband's lap and disrupted the meeting with her clamoring boys. Charity was not on my mind.

But my husband saw an opportunity to help. He carefully ripped the back of the program into small squares and had each of those boys sit by him as he drew them pictures. Jared has a talent for drawing fun little animal cartoons that kids just love. These boys were no exception. He was kind and attentive, and they responded to that. So did their grandmother. She thanked Jared over and over.

I was humbled by my husband's good example.

And then we sang the closing song: Because I Have Been Given Much. It is one of my all-time favorite hymns. Many times I have been touched by the simple text of this song, but it had new meaning after watching my sweet husband share his gifts and love to these little boys.

Because I have been given much, I too must give;
Because of thy great bounty, Lord, each day I live;
I shall divide my gifts from thee
With every brother that I see
Who has the need of help from me.

Because I have been sheltered, fed by thy good care,
I cannot see another’s lack and I not share
My glowing fire, my loaf of bread,
My roof’s safe shelter overhead,
That he too may be comforted.

Because I have been blessed by thy great love, dear Lord,
I’ll share thy love again, according to thy word.
I shall give love to those in need;
I’ll show that love by word and deed:
Thus shall my thanks be thanks indeed.

-- Grace Nowell Crowell

It was such a simple thing Jared did; he drew a few pictures. But it was so much more than I was willing to give. While I was content to be put out and annoyed, he saw someone in need and shared. I hope I can remember the lesson he taught me, and that the next time I see someone in need, I too will give.

making it real

SHIFANG, China — At the moment of greatest despair, Wang Zhijun tried to kill himself by twisting his neck against the debris.

Breathing had become harder as day turned to night. The chunks of brick and concrete that had buried him and his wife were pressing tighter by the hour, crushing them. Their bodies had gone numb.

Then there was the rain, sharp and cold, lashing at them through the cracks.

“I don’t think I can make it,” he told his wife, Li Wanzhi, his face just inches from hers, their arms wrapped around each other.

She sensed he was giving up. “If God wants to kill us, he would have killed us right away,” she said. “But since we’re still alive, we must be fated to live.”

And they lived. They were pulled from the rubble of their collapsed six-story workers’ dormitory 28 hours after last Monday’s earthquake, spared the end met by at least 32,000 others....

"In Rubble, Couple Clung to Each Other, and to Life", By Edward Wong, New York Times

This is an amazing story of a husband and wife who survived the earthquake in China. It really makes it real. This is definitely worth five minutes of your time.

29 weeks

How your baby's growing: Your baby now weighs about 2 1/2 pounds (like a butternut squash) and is a tad over 15 inches long from head to heel. His muscles and lungs are continuing to mature, and his head is growing bigger to make room for his developing brain. To meet his increasing nutritional demands, you'll need plenty of protein, vitamins C, folic acid, and iron. And because his bones are soaking up lots of calcium, be sure to drink your milk (or find another good source of calcium, such as cheese, yogurt, or enriched orange juice). This trimester, about 250 milligrams of calcium are deposited in your baby's hardening skeleton each day.

Another week down, 11 more (give or take a couple) to go! Today Jared was looking at the schedule for the class he is teaching this summer. He gives his final on July 24th. I told Asher he is free to come July 25th! I definitely won't be counting on that, but here's hoping he's not one of those 41 or 42 weekers. And here is the latest look at pregnant me.

pregnancy revelations a la melissa

My friend Melissa is due with her first baby 4 weeks before me. She's having a boy too. Today she wrote a beautiful post on her blog called "Realizations" about her physical and emotional journey during her pregnancy. I won't ramble on about it. You should just go read it. It's beautiful.

a victory plan for hillary

According to Gail Collins New York Times editorial today, this is all that must happen for Hillary to win the nomination:

1) A big, big win in Kentucky next Tuesday. Ideally, Obama should be limited to no more than 100 votes.

2) Oregon, scheduled for the same day, inexplicably breaks off and sinks into the Pacific Ocean.

3) Puerto Rico, clocking in on June 1, not only gives Clinton a huge majority, but also manages to become a state in advance of the vote.

4) Finally, on June 3 as the South Dakota polls open, Thomas Jefferson’s head on Mount Rushmore comes to life and starts shouting, “You go, girl.”

Think she can pull it off?

one of those days

Ick. I'm having one of those days. The kind where you just feel off but can't quite put your finger on the exact reason why. Although I do have a few suspicions--

My long awaited camera is back ordered.
I'm at work doing stuff that I could care less about when I would rather be at home getting ready to move.
My house is one big pile of stuff that needs to be organized and packed.
I have a mild headache.
My ever growing tummy is starting to cause aches and pains, and although it's not too terrible now, I know it's just going to get worse.
After getting a slow start, I now seem to be putting on the pregnancy pounds much quicker than the recommended one pound per week. If I continue at the rate I've set the past few weeks, I'm going to be huge by the end. Here's hoping this is just a phase.
I'm really, really sick of my job. But at the same time feel bad that I have to go part-time and then quit fairly soon. Still, I really, really didn't want to come back after lunch today.

Ok enough of that. I think I'm feeling mildly better already just getting that out there. As I said, it's just one of those days.

weekend recap

We had a really good weekend. Saturday Jared helped a guy from church move, and I ventured out to the mall to buy some new comfy flip flops. I also bought a few maternity shirts and after waiting in line forever at the register my feet were killing me. But that didn't stop me from going to a dance party some friends of ours threw. It was so fun! We all acted quite silly and had a rockin' time. But yeah, my feet felt like they wanted to fall off by the end of the night. And the next day. And even today they are still sore. They aren't so happy about all the abuse while having to support a baby too.

Yesterday was of course Mother's Day. Jared made me waffles for breakfast and made lunch too. He was going to make salmon for dinner but neither of us were very hungry, so we are saving that meal for tonight. He also wrote me a beautiful card.

Last night we went over to our friends' Steve and Rebekah's for a little party to celebrate Steve's graduation. He is now Dr. V. Oh what a glorious day it will be when Jared graduates! Steve and Rebekah and their four kids are leaving us soon to move to California. Steve will be teaching at UC-Berkley. We will miss them! They are some of our favorite people here. Rebekah has some killer moves on the dance floor. :-)

We also got some great news yesterday--Jared's graduate adviser is rehiring him as his research assistant for next year. This is a HUGE relief as Jared's funding from the University is up, and with a baby coming, I won't be able to work full-time. Jared will be able to work from home again next year while he studies for his comprehensive exams and starts his dissertation. We feel SO very blessed! And excited that we will be in North Carolina one more year.

In other news, we are moving into a new apartment in three weeks. It's closer to campus and near a ton of people we go to church with. It's going to be really nice to have friends close by when the baby comes. Plus, utilities are included in the rent, so I'm not going to feel too guilty about having the AC going during the sweltering NC summer! Unfortunately, moving means packing and cleaning and unpacking--all things I don't enjoy. I need to get started so that I'm not overwhelmed a couple days before, especially because I am working full-time. Sigh. I hate packing.

Oh and last but not least.... I bought my camera!!! I've been really wanting a digital SLR camera for a long time now. My parents gave me a nice chunk of change for my birthday back in January that I've been saving towards my camera. And since we just got our little stimulus package from the government, I thought I'd take the plunge and order it. I am SO excited! It's going to be so fun to figure it out and practice and start taking some better photos. For those who want to know, I got the Nikon D80 and two lenses--the 18-200mm f/3.5-5.6G ED-IF AF-S VR II DX Nikkor Lens and the 50mm f/1.8D AF Nikkor Lens. It should be here by next week.

28 weeks

How your baby's growing: By this week, your baby weighs two and a quarter pounds (like a Chinese cabbage) and measures 14.8 inches from the top of his head to his heels. He can blink his eyes, which now sport lashes. With his eyesight developing, he may be able to see the light that filters in through your womb. He's also developing billions of neurons in his brain and adding more body fat in preparation for life in the outside world.

two books every mom or mom-to-be should read

I recently finished reading Birth and am now reading Pushed. I think every woman who plans to have children should read these books. They have me pretty fired up right now about obstetrical practices in our country and how they are affecting women and babies. I think I will probably write a more in-depth post about my feelings later, but for now I want to HIGHLY recommend these books. Go to your library and check these out! They are both written by female journalists who did extensive research. They will open your eyes to maternity care in the US and seriously make you think.

Birth: The Surprising History of How We Are Born
(the link takes you to Amazon, which has a good review)

This book is a well-research history of birth practices beginning with the evolution of human pelvises and head size and covering every fad and medical "advance" to help women give birth. The author, Tina Cassidy, a former journalist for the Boston Globe, set out to research the history of birth after the unplanned cesarean of her first son. The book is quick read as it flows very nicely from topic to topic and is full of meaningful anecdotes as well as study-based findings.

Here is a link to Tina Cassidy's blog.

Pushed: The Painful Truth About Childbirth and Modern Maternity Care

As the title suggests, this book is much more focused on modern maternity practices. I am about half-way through it, and the more I read the more fired-up I get. Jennifer Block, also a journalist, did exhaustive research to write this. She cites hundreds of studies and talked to many, many medical professionals and mothers about the birth experience in the US. Did you know that some women are so traumatized by their birth experience they get Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, the same disorder that soldiers in war and victims of extreme violence are diagnosed with?

Here is the book info from Jennifer Block's blog:

In Pushed: The Painful Truth About Childbirth and Modern Maternity Care (Da Capo, 2007), Block reports on the current state of maternity care across the country, from inside the operating room of a hospital with a 44% cesarean rate to the living room floor of a woman who gives birth in a kiddie pool with an illegal midwife. Pushed is not a pregnancy guide, but rather a narrative investigation of modern American childbirth.

Do routine inductions, C-sections, and epidurals equal medical progress? Why are home-birth midwives illegal in 11 states? Why are physicians and hospitals denying women vaginal births after cesarean? Can breech babies be born vaginally? How did episiotomies become routine? Where does Pitocin come from? Should midwives go to jail? Is home birth safe? Are women really requesting unnecessary C-sections? Is normal birth the next “woman’s right to choose”? Pushed tackles all these questions and more.

I have a lot I want to say, but I'm going to say it later. I just can't emphasize strongly enough that I think these books are well worth your time if you ever plan on giving birth.

election day in north carolina

If you live in North Carolina (or Indiana) go vote today!!! Even though I think this primary season has lasted too long, it is really fun that my vote here in NC is counting for something. Jared and I actually voted on Saturday, the last day of early voting. There were a lot of people there. Voter turnout is expected to be at a record high this year.

27 weeks

How your baby's growing: This week your baby weighs almost 2 pounds (like a head of cauliflower) and is about 14.4 inches long with his legs extended. He can now open and close his eyes, and he sleeps and wakes at regular intervals. He may suck his fingers, and although his lungs are still immature, they would be capable of functioning — with assistance — if he were to be born prematurely. Chalk up any rhythmic movement you may be feeling to a case of baby hiccups, which may be common from now on. Each episode usually lasts only a few moments, and isn't bothersome to him, so enjoy the tickle. With more brain tissue developing, your baby's brain is very active now. Wonder what he's thinking?

Asher is due in less than three months now! Wahoo! Here is the picture of the week. For some reason I look a bit drugged. Don't know why.

the big cut

Here I am in the chair as she's putting in the pony tails. I look nervous, but I actually wasn't.

Measuring the ponytails to make sure they were all at least 10 inches. I'm pretty sure they were close to 12.

Making the cut. She had to work hard to get her shears through my hair.

Bye-bye first ponytail.The raw cut and the ponytails.

Now to make it pretty.
She ended up using the thinning shears a lot. My hair is thick! I didn't even realize how thick it is since I haven't ever had it this short. Plus, it's thicker now since I'm pregnant.My final haircut (with unruly bangs) and the hair I gave away.
This haircut took forever! We were there for 2 hours!

Back at home...
Here is the back of my hair.

And here is the front. I might cut my bangs a little shorter, but I'm very happy with it.

It actually doesn't even feel that weird to have my hair so short, even though it is the shortest I've ever had it. I think it's because I've been mentally prepared for months, since I decided to do this a year ago. It will be so nice not to have all that long hair during the hot North Carolina summer.

so long hair so long

Please bid a fond farewell to these long, long locks.
Today is the day they will chopped off and shipped to Locks of Love.
I hope some little red haired girl who lost her hair will enjoy these years of growth.
I blow dried and straightened my hair today for the occasion.
It takes WAY too long with this much hair.

I was quite shocked when I saw this photo.
I honestly didn't realize how long my hair is!
I don't usually get to see the back view.

I will look like a new woman tonight!