answered prayers

This beautiful building is the Bountiful Utah Temple of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. In my faith, temples symbolize the most sacred and eternal parts of our religion. It is in these beautiful houses of God that we participate in special ordinances that bind us to our family members for eternity and where we learn the way to return to our Father in Heaven. There is no other place like them on Earth.

The temple is also where every Mormon girl and boy dreams of getting married. We are taught from a very young age to keep ourselves worthy to be married in the temple. We believe that marriages performed in these sacred buildings will last forever, instead of being "'til death do us part." All of my life I imagined my wedding day as taking place at the temple. When the Bountiful temple was built, I knew that is where I wanted to get married. I was born in Bountiful and both my parents grew up there. And this temple is GORGEOUS!

But as often happens in life, things don't always turn out the way we plan. Just as I always dreamed, I fell in love with a wonderful, righteous man. But this good man also happened to be divorced. His first marriage took place in the temple, and although he is legally divorced, that first temple sealing is still in place in the eyes of the Church. And in order for him to be sealed to me, he had to get permission from the President of the Church to do so. This is quite the involved process with all sorts of letters that must be written. I won't get into all the details, but if anyone has questions they can email me. We went through this process when we were engaged, hoping that we would get permission to be married in the temple. Sadly, our request was denied.

There is no reason given for the rejection. We were just told to reapply in a year. I can honestly say that being told I couldn't marry the man I love in the temple, even though we are both worthy to enter those holy doors, has been the hardest trial of my life. I had to readjust all my expectations for my wedding day. I had to mourn the loss of a "temple marriage". I had to try to understand why I was being denied what I'd been told my whole life to strive for and not settle for anything less. And now we were told to just be patient, that it didn't really matter whether we were sealed this year or next or the year after. Just get married civilly, leaders said. This seemed to be a shocking reversal of everything I had ever been taught in the church.

But we did. We went to the temple the morning of our wedding with a few family members and friends because we wanted to start our wedding day in that holy place even if we couldn't be married there. And then that evening we had a beautiful wedding. We were married by my former bishop in the University of Utah Museum of Art surrounded by beautiful Brian Kershisnik paintings. We had our family and friends there. Jared's children were there. It was a sacred and happy day. And we've had a most magical first year of marriage. I have never been happier.

But this trial of my faith and the patience required to wait for my "eternal" marriage has been difficult. It has made me question many things. I have also learned things that I would never have otherwise. The greatest gift of this has been the empathy I have gained. I now know what it's like to feel outside of the box. I know what it's like to be told no to a righteous desire. I know what it's like to wait for something you achingly long for. And for these lessons, I am grateful. I am a better person because of this experience.

When we decided to try for a baby, we knew that it was a leap of faith. We knew there was a chance we wouldn't be sealed before the baby was born. But I felt so strongly that we should not wait anymore. I am grateful for the prayers that were answered that gave us the courage to go forward with faith and conceive this precious little baby. Knowing that we are adding to our family has made our desire to be sealed even greater.

Yesterday afternoon, we got the letter we have been waiting so long for. Signed by Thomas S. Monson, Henry B. Eyring, and Dieter F. Uchtdorf, this letter says that Jared may be sealed to me in the temple. It is dated March 12, 2008. One year and two days since our wedding day. Next week, we will be going to Utah, and we will be sealed together as eternal spouses in the Bountiful Utah Temple with our closest family in attendance. I can hardly believe it is real.

I am so grateful for everyone who has prayed for us this past year. I am grateful for those answered prayers. I am grateful I will finally have the blessings of the most sacred sealing ordinance. I am grateful that I get to be with my dear, dear husband forever. And I am grateful that our little baby will be there too nestled safely inside me.